Lucas Salaberry, Grade 12
UWC Robert Bosch College
Walking past the barrel-shaped seating area behind the auditorium, all I remember is the dew brushing up against my ankles and the view of the lights of the school and pathways while I cuddled up to my blanket to fight the cold. The cold. The chills I got from the silence were the worst not because anything happened, but because nothing did. It was as though with one closing of a door, the opening completely disappeared. These were how I felt when a friend of mine and I would stop talking, despite what I wanted to admit.
Today we were supposed to describe ourselves in 5 words and I said mine, but as the people around me said theirs one word stuck out to me and reminded me of this friend: being opinionated. They were the first person that made me realize the importance of running with what you believe in and not stopping for anyone else. The courage to leave things behind, run too fast that you miss things, or simply burn out were things I never even considered because that just wasn’t me, and in all reality it isnt. I was not opinionated enough to be confident enough in myself to bet on myself and no one else and they forced me to confront that fact.
Sometimes I catch myself falling into avoiding the silence just to put an end to it, but I wonder if I am not comfortable enough in that silence, then am I ending it for the right reasons. I recognize I often articulate my opinions using my thought process or in other words dumping all the intrusive thoughts sometimes… often misguided and in need of correcting, in one sentence. This sometimes doesn’t positively contribute to a discussion or a conversation because what do you do with that, how do you make something out of nothing, it's just not possible. Unfortunately or fortunately, that is what I just did.
One way or another we found our way back together mainly because instead of holding on tight to what was not there, we focused on what we had and that was an underlying platonic love for each other. Despite sometimes there being toxicity and that toxicity often not completely disappearing the next day, more and more we acknowledge our own roles and responsibilities in regards to a shared goal: mutual respect and understanding.
But why has this person impacted me so much? I didn’t reach a point where I could truly stand the silence nor did I reach a place where I communicate more effectively. What I did do, was ask myself these questions and eventually realize that to promote toleration in space where it is needed the most like UWC, we have to recognize these differences and not only be accommodating to others but be mindful of what type of environment our processes create for others. They have truly shaped me into not who I am, but who I aspire to become.
Citation
https://www.pexels.com/photo/shallow-focus-photography-of-green-grasses-during-daytime-212324/
Today we were supposed to describe ourselves in 5 words and I said mine, but as the people around me said theirs one word stuck out to me and reminded me of this friend: being opinionated. They were the first person that made me realize the importance of running with what you believe in and not stopping for anyone else. The courage to leave things behind, run too fast that you miss things, or simply burn out were things I never even considered because that just wasn’t me, and in all reality it isnt. I was not opinionated enough to be confident enough in myself to bet on myself and no one else and they forced me to confront that fact.
Sometimes I catch myself falling into avoiding the silence just to put an end to it, but I wonder if I am not comfortable enough in that silence, then am I ending it for the right reasons. I recognize I often articulate my opinions using my thought process or in other words dumping all the intrusive thoughts sometimes… often misguided and in need of correcting, in one sentence. This sometimes doesn’t positively contribute to a discussion or a conversation because what do you do with that, how do you make something out of nothing, it's just not possible. Unfortunately or fortunately, that is what I just did.
One way or another we found our way back together mainly because instead of holding on tight to what was not there, we focused on what we had and that was an underlying platonic love for each other. Despite sometimes there being toxicity and that toxicity often not completely disappearing the next day, more and more we acknowledge our own roles and responsibilities in regards to a shared goal: mutual respect and understanding.
But why has this person impacted me so much? I didn’t reach a point where I could truly stand the silence nor did I reach a place where I communicate more effectively. What I did do, was ask myself these questions and eventually realize that to promote toleration in space where it is needed the most like UWC, we have to recognize these differences and not only be accommodating to others but be mindful of what type of environment our processes create for others. They have truly shaped me into not who I am, but who I aspire to become.
Citation
https://www.pexels.com/photo/shallow-focus-photography-of-green-grasses-during-daytime-212324/
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